The Mistakes We Knew We Were Making.

It's crazy to think about how many times you make the same mistake over and over again, just hoping for a different outcome every time you commit those mistakes.  Sometimes it can be just as simple as holding the key in the wrong direction when you try to open your door or it can be a complex, by making one mistake and creating a domino effect that just propels you into a downward motion.  Now, I didn't commit THAT complex of a mistake, like starting heroine or anything crazy like that, but there's been some bad mistakes that I constantly make that create a negative effect in my life.  It can be something as small as procrastinating when studying or doing homework or something as big as being with the wrong people and causing yourself and your lifestyle to change and suffer in that way as well.

I'd hope to think that I grew up in someway during college... and at least that I got those types of life experiences out of the way, but I know that it's only going to get harder from this point on.  Getting accustomed to the ways to work everyday with the same people and probably working on things that I don't like with people I don't like, but at the end... everybody's has to go through the same and try to reach the top right?  It's not like I can really complain anyway... I don't even have a job at this moment and I'm still scratching my way up to at least find a good one.

I guess as 2013 is wrapping up it's end... I'm just thinking about how much has changed throughout this year. Honestly, I think I've made some pretty bad choices and some pretty good choices as well throughout this year.

• It sucks that it's taken a 3 years, but I feel like school and studying is finally on track to what it should be, and that I'm taking every moment more seriously now... (except when I'm on breaks... that's when I'm literally living a sloth life).
• I've made some good friends, and lost some good friends, but life is always a revolving door.  You just have to accept that people will come and go, and that experiences shared by you and the people that came into your life will be the ones that make the ultimate impact on your life, and you can't linger and hope for the friendship to come back.  Either you work for it, or you just have to accept that you moved on your separate ways and hopefully one day, you'll be able to reunite once more
• I've experienced the first death in the family and it was a real impact.  I wrote about it a lot, so I really don't have to write anymore on it.
• I've come to love my family and everyone in it.  I guess this came hand-in-hand with the prior one, but I've really come to love my family.  All my cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents.  I'm really lucky that they're all nearby and that we're always able to share the holidays together.
• I've cut down on gaming... but I've come to watch more TV shows.  Definitely a good choice to cut back on gaming, but a bad one to fill the time that I spent on gaming to watch TV.  I'll be trying to fill that void of time by reading next year instead.

It's weird to think that I'm going to be assimilated into the "real" world soon and that my school days are coming to a close.  I mean college is where the domino effects of my actions are supposed to start, but I don't think I fully recognized that yet.  In some ways I did grow up and recognize some of my faults, but that's only the first step.  It's not like I started acting upon them to fix myself and become a better person, but just like how I do most of my actions in life... I acknowledge the problem and then just try to get by without fixing them or facing them head on.

That's definitely one thing I need to continually work on throughout the next years of my life before that side of me makes a critical mistake that I can't fix just by "getting by".  2013 was a good year and I can only hope that when I get into a new chapter of my life, 2014 can treat me the same.